I have a beautiful bouquet of red roses on my living room table. There are 13 to be exact. I am not sure why roses come in "baker's dozens" but this bouquet did. This bouquet was a bit of a surprise but certainly an appreciated one. Both of us have been feeling pretty stressed and overloaded of late. There has not been much time for romantic thoughts or time together. As I was admiring the flowers, I started to think about this whole love and marriage thing and what it has meant to me. Its funny how defining our experiences as a child can be.
My parents certainly gave me the opportunity to learn about love in marriage. When I think of how much they loved each other, one core image is ever present. I see them wrapped in a passionate embrace, (usually in the kitchen, it was where my mother was), sharing a long and deeply romantic kiss.
We had a picture in the family album of them kissing like that. The picture was taken when they were probably in their late 30's or early forties. The picture was black and white and so the tones were muted and soft. They were standing on a hill and there was just a bit of a breeze. You could tell that from Mom's dress and hair. The embrace was perfectly choreographed. My father was lithe and strong. My mother, slender, fitting perfectly in my father's arms as he held her close. The picture of that embrace, that wonderful image of romance and the feeling of deep and abiding love that it brings are forever part of me.
These demonstrations of love were frequent, so much so that my friends could not help but also see them. If not kissing, just holding hands while they watched TV. At least three friends commented on how lucky I was. They had never seen their parents kiss or even sleep in the same room. Another friend just recently said what a difference being in our loving home had made to her. It was the only experience that she had of happy family life as a child. I realized, how I have taken it for granted.
There were other ways that they showed that they loved each other. They were always together. Mom spent very little time in the house or working in the yard. She was so often with Dad - going to town, feeding the cattle, doing the chores. We were frequently left alone since when Dad went to Bull Sales or on other business, Mom always went too. That was okay. It didn't ever bother me that Mom and Dad loved each other more than us.
What a difference it has made to me - this example. I have been blessed to have a wonderful and loving friend and companion for almost 35 years. We too have passionately kissed in the kitchen. We have not been able to work and be always together but have stolen time together whenever we could. Late night shopping at IGA, picking up kids from lessons,Sunday afternoon naps and especially (for me anyway) jogging in the morning.
When I left home to go to university, my mother said that she hoped I wasn't offended but that she was looking forward to just being with "Daddy". I wasn't, and as much as I love my children, I look forward to just being with "Daddy" too.
3 comments:
i really enjoy reading your blog!!!!!!!
keep it up!
perfect valentines post. thanks for sharing what has made your marriage good. inspires me in my marriage.
I remember when you told me that you loved Dad thet most and at first I was a little offended. But then it made sense. I look forward to sharing that precious information with Dot someday.
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